Young MA - Sober Thoughts Lyrics

Oh, nah-nah-nah-nah
Nah-nah, ye-yeah

Disciplinin' my habits, went distant on my attachments
I had to turn my presence to absence
Stuck in a cage, questionin' the hours and days
Depressional phase, my tunnel vision startin' to fade
I started to marry my thoughts, already engaged
Not knowing my next move had me going insane
Depending on alcohol to get me over the pain
Praying my habit don't ever have me turn to cocaine
I won't allow this temporary pain to turn to a stain
I wanna live but my joy for life is stuck in the grave
God I need you more than ever, I was hoping you came
So used to holdin' shit in, it's kinda hard to explain
Picasso the best way to put it
Before you knew the meaning of it, you misunderstood it
Far from perfect, did a lot of shit I knew I shouldn't
Duckin' my demons but they comin' like a movin' bullet
Shit, it's crazy out here, it's like I love it and I hate it out here
Gotta be mentally stable out here, just to make it out here
Never slippin', everyday I'm aware
If I ain't got it, I'll go get it, and I'll make it appear
Tough love, being assertive, that's the way that I care
When I'm distant and I ignore you, then to me you ain't there
When I erase you that's when you worry, replace yo ass in a hurry
That's the truth, not a dare, nigga do not compare

All this pain in me, I want it washed away
I gotta keep faith in me, these niggas want me dead
I gotta stay strong, stay strong
I've been fightin' all my life, oh
May God watch my soul (uh, uh)

Only people that think that I fell off
Is people who wasn't supportin' before the fame and the fortune
My fanbase was already a force and
I was sellin' out shows before the radio sources
Meanin' the grind of independence what got me in it
Not a co-sign or a mention and this is not fiction
Now I'm feelin' attention from muhf*ckers
That once was dick-lickin', and pic-flickin' friendship
And this isn't no damn fool
I know the game so it's cool
And when you play the game, play it by the rules, uh
Mama ain't raise no coon, I know the difference between loved and used
Life is just hugs and bruises, care and crew
F*ck desire, my heart pump fire, ooh
Don't inhale my fumes, I'm toxic, caged in like zoos
Boxed in like boxin', in the studio locked in
Man you couldn't walk a block in my shoes
Not even my socks, shit
Came from the bottom that's why I f*ck with the top shit
I'm talkin' 'bout that never, ever, ever in stock shit
I don't pop shit, I speak knowledge, just call me a prophet
And if you pay attention then you payin' homage
Cheap jeans with paid pockets, this poundcake
Got these weight watchers weight watchin', uh
I ain't stoppin' like Hov said
Sit in front of the Bentley, with the doors out like bow-legs
I hate a bitch with a fat ass and no legs
I love a bitch with some crack pussy and dope head
Broke bread with niggas, all I got was a thank you
And you got some other niggas out here sayin' they made you, ha
The game tryin' to erase you, got my foot on they necks
You disrespect the tech I'll give you a facial, uh
Apologies to my exes, and no this ain't my confessions
Appreciate your time and investment, patience and effort
Having ya'll was part of a blessin'
Y'all all belong on the cover of Essence
No hard feelings, no love lost
No bad blood, your love is a bad drug
But better to have love than no love
I need a blunt, KorLeone, can you roll one?
And smoke one?

All this pain in me, I want it washed away
I gotta keep faith in me, these niggas want me dead
I gotta stay strong, stay strong
I've been fightin' all my life, oh
May God watch my soul, ah

Oh, all these battles I've been fighting
Ooh, all these battles I've been fighting
I just gotta keep on goin' on, on and on, and on, ooh-oh