DOCTOR IN FIFE
A doctor there was and he lived in Fife
Physicum tysicum ho
He had a wife was the bane of his life
With a squalery brawlery ho
With a squalery brawlery he
She worried and plagued this unfortunate elf
When patients were few he was patient himself
At last she sickened and lay on the shelf
With a sigh away die away ho (2x)
The doctor had often in sables rehearsed
Sign away die away ho
He always wore mourning for fear of the worst
With his seem to grieve, laugh in sleeve ho...
It happened that night that a gentleman bred
Dig away in the clay ho
With the grave occupation of raising the dead
With his coffin crack, spade and sack ho...
Rang he one in the morning the doctor's night bell
"Doctor I've brought you a subject to sell
The watchman is neigh, so be quick or he'll tell
With your cut and slash, pay the cash oh..."
The doctor had scarcely refastened the door
Lock and chain, bolt again ho
When he thought in the sack he heard somebody snore
With a snoozalum foozalum ho...
He opened the sack to examine his prize
Who can imagine the doctor's surprise
His wife had come back again and she opened her eyes
With a squalery brawlery ho...