TIMŌRĀTUS - Christmas Present Conundrum (Courtney's Crisis) Lyrics

Crap, I forgot to get him something this year
How fast does Amazon ship
What do I do
Where do I start
Maybe this CD
How 'bout this color chart
Maybe this stupid stamp so he can cover his stuff in wax bees
No, I've got to go deeper
I've got to think smart
What was it he was saying
I should know it by heart
If only it was so easy
If I wasn't so busy
It wouldn't have slipped my mind
And I wouldn't have fallen so far behind
Look, look, look, there's got to be something
Can I have some more cream
And an extra shot of caffeine
It would really mean a lot to me
It's been a long day
Hey weirdo, how's it going
Not awesome, I totally forgot to get my hubby something for Christmas
Geez, why'd you wait so long
Well
I had so much going on this year
Too much of people wanting their fill
Birthdays, Weddings and Baby Showers too
I totes forgot about my him
Oh, you could cook him a nice dinner
Yeah
Sit him down at the table
Go to the kitchen and pull out the meal from the oven
Whisk it out gently
Place it on his plate
Then just take it to him
With a smile
On my face
He's not a "foodie". He'd be totally fine if he could eat cereal for every meal
Oh, well, that sucks... you could get him a gift card
Gift cards, nothin' but plastic
Don't know what he wants, what he needs, what'll make him complete
Rollin' to the store, near in the front, next the checkout
Gamestop (for dem games)
Barnes and Nobles (for dem books)
I could get him a 50 dolla Starbucks card, but he'd only spend it on hot chocolate
What 'bout a Walmart card (shop dem groceries)
Pack da bag full of dranks
Side of chips
Full of swag
Nah, these plastic cards are not the best for expressing what's close to chest
What are you gonna do
Are you really gonna mess this up
You should be able to find something he'd love
He's not that hard to pick for
You're so stupid for forgetting this year
He's gonna hate you
No he won't
He loves making music
Okay hunny, I know I didn't really get you anything last year
But THIS year I really thought outside the box
I got you the gift, of song
Merry Christmas Hunny
Merry Christmas babe
I love you so stinkin' much
It makes my belly ache
Wow... Awesome
Anyway, I know how much you love music and love playing with new toys
So, I got you this foreign speak n' spell
But, for some reason they spelled it with a 'G'
Tha... that's a glockenspiel... but, sweet