STATE OF MIND Video (MV)

Wishing that I was a little bit stronger, but I don't see myself passing twenty-five
Hanging by a thread, and it feels like torture
Shadows in my room change shape like Pennywise
If there is a way out of this, can you help me
I don't leave my room, so I'm left sulking
'Cause I don't see myself being happy
And I'm always feeling like I have nothing
There's some things that I wanna put to rest
Like my dad's death that I haven't digest
That's why I haven't picked up alcohol
'Cause it will never really help me at all
I need to escape this hell
'Cause I feel like I'm trapped in a cell
I wish I can tell you I'm fine
But I'm really not with this state of mind
Falling into pieces everytime
Everyone I love just ends up flatlined
That's why I push away my friends
'Cause I don't wanna see their life end
I got lot of trauma, and I'm only twenty-two
People don't know that their lies are see through
And that's why I got trust issues
'Cause I'm the one that always used
So I just sit in the silence
So my thoughts don't get violent
My thoughts are so Velcro
And they won't let me go
Wish I had the strength to heal
So, I can get rid of this pain that's real
And dig myself out of this empty hole
And finally feel like I am whole
Stuck with my thoughts, and I feel so crazy
'Cause they always want me pushing daises
So, I'm all alone, and I feel trapped inside
With a mind that has thoughts of suicide
I need to escape this hell
'Cause I feel like I'm trapped in a cell
I wish I can tell you I'm fine
But I'm really not with this state of mind