Tate McRae - I Used to Think I Could Fly Album Lyrics

It's crazy to me because you grow up
You lose friends
You're suddenly scared of things that you were literally never scared of before
And when I was younger, like, I used to think I could fly

Yeah, if you wanna go ahead and lie to me
Throw it all out now, that's fine with me
Uh, if I'm not enough for you, honestly
I hope you don't come back
When you see that I'm better off
When you're all broke down and you're missing us
When you finally figure out just what you lost
I hope you don't come back

I can feel you shutting off now
Like I always expected you would
Start believing all your friends now
'Cause they all say that you get bored
I feel it
You're about to cut me out your life
I feel it
Just know that there's no second try

Yeah, if you wanna go ahead and lie to me
Throw it all out now, that's fine with me
Uh, if I'm not enough for you, honestly
I hope you don't come back
When you see that I'm better off
When you're all broke down and you're missing us
When you finally figure out just what you lost
I hope you don't come back

You can see me shutting off now (off now)
I don't know what else you'd expect
Really thought I knew you so well (so well)
Shoulda known that's what I'd get
For thinking that you cared at all
I bet you'll blame it on the alcohol
Again, don't be acting so surprised
When you see there's no second try

Yeah, if you wanna go ahead and lie to me
Throw it all out now, that's fine with me
Uh, if I'm not enough for you, honestly
I hope you don't come back
When you see that I'm better off
When you're all broke down and you're missing us
When you finally figure out just what you lost
I hope you don't come back

When you haven't heard from me in forever
Don't come back
When you find out there's nobody better
Don't come back

(Ooh, no don't come back)
(Oh)

('Cause) yeah, if you wanna go ahead and lie to me
Throw it all out now, that's fine with me

Go ahead and get wasted
Wreck your life, I won't say shit
Don't be calling my name
When I'm so gone, I hope that you hate it
Never left your dad's basement
Now you're mad that I made it
Don't be calling my name
When I'm so gone, I hope that you hate it

Call me on the phone again today
Say that you're lonely
I've been moving on, I think it's just too late, oh
You promised that the two of us were fate
Isn't it funny how you say that after pushing me away? Oh

Used to say you needed something new
Now you're back 'cause I'm good without you
After always leaving me confused
Just cut me off like you said you want to

Go ahead and get wasted (wasted)
Wreck your life, I won't say shit (say shit)
Don't be calling my name
When I'm so gone, I hope that you hate it (hate it)
Never left your dad's basement (basement)
Now you're mad that I made it (made it)
Don't be calling my name
When I'm so gone, I hope that you hate it

Don't think you're gonna get a second try
When you're outta options
All your bitches find out all you do is lie
Oh, oh, don't you to try to tell me we're alright
I don't wanna talk at all
I honestly don't even got the time, ooh

Used to say you needed something new
Now you're back 'cause I'm good without you
After always leaving me confused
Just cut me off like you said you want to

Go ahead and get wasted (wasted)
Wreck your life, I won't say shit (say shit)
Don't be calling my name
When I'm so gone, I hope that you hate it (hate it)
Never left your dad's basement (basement)
Now you're mad that I made it (made it)
Don't be calling my name
When I'm so gone, I hope that you hate it

You think you're such a cool kid
And everybody likes you
Know you think I'm stupid
Say you know more than I do
But what you'll never understand
Is I used to be such a fan
But now you're such a cool kid
It's like I don't even know you, yeah

I'm getting really sick
Sick of how sorry sounds
Coming right out your mouth, oh
Don't get too comfortable
'Cause I might not be there
Next time you turn around

So
What would you do if I leave and don't come back?
I hope it breaks you in two
If I gave back all the pain that you put me through
What would you do?

I've always been a nice girl
I'm pretty understanding
But you mess with my head, boy
And you're taking me for granted
And you're probably gonna throw a fit (throw a fit)
When I call you out on all your shit (all your shit)
Yeah, I used to be a nice girl
I bet you wish it lasted
Oh

I'm getting really sick
Sick of how sorry sounds
Coming right out your mouth, oh
Don't get too comfortable
'Cause I might not be there
Next time you turn around

So
What would you do if I leave and don't come back?
I hope it breaks you in two
If I gave back all the pain that you put me through
What would you do?

We'll make plans and I won't show up
I won't listen, I'll interrupt
When your birthday comes won't answer ya
'Cause, so what? So what?
I'll go out and kiss your friends
Like, oh my god, get over it
Yeah, go get drunk so you forget
I'm gone

What would you do if I leave and don't come back?
I hope it breaks you in two
Breaks you in two
If I gave back all the pain that you put me through
What would you do?
Ooh ooh, what would you do?
Ooh ooh, what would you do?

I have this paralyzing fear that I'll maybe go nowhere
But God forbid me ever admitting I could be scared
And I can't stand my friends right now, we got nothing in common
But being lonely's worse than just having friends that don't care

You said it looks like I've been going through hell
How did you know? How could you tell?
Ask me to explain myself, well

I'm trying my best here to be brutally honest
Nobody said changing would be this exhausting
A foot on the brake 'cause it's been making me carsick
How could you blame me? Growing up is chaotic

Don't wanna say it but I really think that I miss him
It might seem stupid but I still look through all of our texts
Who knew that wanting someone could ever make me this desperate?
Don't think I'll do that again, no

You said it looks like I've been going through hell
How did you know? How could you tell?
You ask me to explain myself, well

I'm trying my best here to be brutally honest
Nobody said changing would be this exhausting
A foot on the brake 'cause it's been making me carsick
How could you blame me? Growing up is chaotic (ah)

And maybe I'm just blowing all this shit up in my head
But I can't help it, no, I can't help it (ah)
Fooling myself thinking that I'll never love again
Goddamn, I felt it, I really felt it (ah)
Maybe I'm just blowing all this shit up in my head
But I can't help it, no, I can't help it (ah)
Spending too much time on things I know that I'll forget
But damn, I felt it

I'm trying my best here to be brutally honest
Nobody said changing could be this exhausting
Foot on the brake 'cause it's making me carsick
How could you blame me?

I can say things I don't always mean
When people get too close to me
Don't know where it comes from, honestly
And you, weren't perfect, yeah, you had your lows
But I'd say you got pretty close
Don't know how you could put up with me

I was so caught up in my own thoughts
Don't think that I understood
When you said that you just couldn't take it
That I would lose you for good, oh

I didn't think this over
Fell back when you got closer
After I just put you right through hell
You couldn't hate me more than I hate myself
I'd always act so selfish
Had shit I hadn't dealt with
After I just put you right through hell
You couldn't hate me more than I hate myself

We both know I might be the worst at goodbyes
But I looked at you straight and I lied
And acted like I'd be fine
Sometimes when I care, I think I tend to shut off
Like nothing could matter enough
Why would you let me keep doing that?
You should've stopped me

But I was so caught up in my own thoughts
Don't think that I understood
When you said that you just couldn't take it
That I would lose you for good, oh

I didn't think this over
Fell back when you got closer
After I just put you right through hell
You couldn't hate me more than I hate myself
I'd always act so selfish
Had shit I hadn't dealt with
After I just put you right through hell
You couldn't hate me more than I hate myself

So off I go to hurt you again
I'll shut you out to try and forget
That I'm the one who's f*cked in the end
'Cause, baby, you'll be happier with someone else
So off I go to hurt you again
I'll shut you out to try and forget
That I'm the one who's f*cked in the end
'Cause you couldn't hate me more than I hate myself

I didn't think this over
Fell back when you got closer
After I just put you right through hell
You couldn't hate me more than I hate myself

What's your problem?
You think that you're a God
You came and f*cked my life up when you knew that I was lost
What's your problem?
I'm crying on the floor
You made me hate myself, just so that I would love you more

I don't give a f*ck about you like I used to
Back when I really thought I knew you
Back when I'd die not to lose you
Yeah, you knew I didn't have many friends when I met you
Was the new kid, trying to impress you
You always loved coming to the rescue

I shoulda known when my mom said she don't like you
Shoulda took that as a sign
Thought I caught you smiling the night that you saw me cry
Bet it feeds your ego
That I'm low all the time
'Cause that shit gets you high

What's your problem?
You think that you're a God
You came and f*cked my life up when you knew that I was lost
What's your problem?
I'm crying on the floor
You made me hate myself, just so that I would love you more

It's funny
You took me 'round town like you owned me
Wanted me for your eyes only
Never wanted anyone to know me
Tried to make me more like you and less like me
You're saying things I won't repeat
That's petty shit, only you would do

I shoulda known when my mom said she don't like you
Shoulda took that as a sign
Thought I caught you smiling the night that you saw me cry
Bet it feeds your ego
That I'm low all the time
'Cause that shit gets you high

What's your problem?
You think that you're a God
You came and f*cked my life up when you knew that I was lost
What's your problem?
I'm crying on the floor
You made me hate myself, just so that I would love you more

What's your problem?
What's your problem?
What's your problem?
You made me hate myself, just so that I would love you more
What's your problem?

(Ooh)
(Ooh)
(Ooh, ooh)

You want the girl with the small waist
And the perfect smile
Someone who's out every week day
In her dad's new car
You tell me I shouldn't stress out
Say it's not that hard
But I just got a feelin'
This'll leave an ugly scar

If you say she's nothing to worry about
Then why'd you close your eyes when you said it out loud?

Stupid boy makin' me so sad
Didn't think you could change this fast
She's got everything that I don't have
How could I ever compete with that?
I know you'll go and change your mind
One day wake up and be bored with mine
She's got everything that I don't have
And she's all I wanna be
All I wanna be so bad
So bad
She's got everything that I don't have, mm

You want someone you can show off
Whenever you go out
She'll wear a tight mini black dress
With all her friends around
And then you'll probably spend the night at
Her nice big house
And by then, I'll just be someone
You've forgotten about, oh

If you say she's nothing to worry about
Then why'd you close your eyes when you said it out loud?

Stupid boy makin' me so sad
Didn't think you could change this fast
She's got everything that I don't have
How could I ever compete with that?
I know you'll go and change your mind
One day wake up and be bored with mine
She's got everything that I don't have
And she's all I wanna be
All I wanna be so bad
So bad
She's got everything that I don't have
And she's all I wanna be
All I wanna be

Ooh (ooh)
(Ooh)
She's all I wanna be so bad
(Ooh)
Oh (ooh)

Stupid boy makin' me so sad
Didn't think it would hurt this bad
She's got everything that I don't have
How could I ever compete with that?
I know you'll go and change your mind
One day wake up and be bored with mine
She's got everything that I don't have
And she's all I wanna be
All I wanna be so bad
All I wanna be so bad
She's got everything that I don't have
And she's all I wanna be
All I wanna be so bad

There was a girl with the toughest of skin
She made sure that everyone around knew that she wasn't sensitive
She walked around, let nobody in
Thought if she never gave her heart away, it'd never end up broken

But boy x across the street, oh, he was one of a kind
Made her fall in love with only just a look in her eyes
When they wandered off to someone else's for the first time
She cried and cried and cried

Next time you move on, like I know you'll do
Tell me you won't treat her like you did with me and you
When she falls hard and a little too soon
Promise you won't promise things you know just won't come true
And don't you dare make her feel like she's the only thing you're seeing
No, don't do that stupid thing with your eyes unless you mean it
When you get bored, like you always do
Tell me that you'll let her go before you look for someone new

Yeah, this very girl, brown eyes and blonde ends
No, she never wasted time but time with him just felt so different
She wrote him songs just to watch him listening
A hundred songs a couple months in
No, she never saw it coming

Next time boy x, he crossed the street, she'd never see him again
She really thought he was forever, then forever was dead
Left her holding up the pieces of her heart by a thread
He left her there to die

Next time you move on, like I know you'll do
Tell me you won't treat her like you did with me and you
When she falls hard and a little too soon
Promise you won't promise things you know just won't come true
And don't you dare make her feel like she's the only thing you're seeing
No, don't do that stupid thing with your eyes unless you mean it
When you get bored, like you always do
Tell me that you'll let her go before you look for someone new

There was a girl, not too different from me
She thought she found her world but then the world found out she's weak
Guess that's okay
No, I just couldn't see
That there's a billion of boy x but babe, there's only one of me

You thought that I would be so hurt
And guess I was for maybe a week or so, it's
Kinda crazy what I learned
Shoulda listened to your exes when they said, "don't"

You take all your issues
Blame 'em on everyone else
I'll bet that if you
Could, you'd
Go on a date with yourself

Oh, you think that you're so f*cking cool (so cool)
Got a new girl and some new tattoos
Yeah, way too f*cking cool (too cool)
But all your best friends really hate you too

Every time I hear your name, why's it make me sick?
Ooh, it's driving me insane that I'm not over it
I can't seem to get away from you (from you)
I would say, "hi", but you're way too f*cking cool

Hit me up on my birthday
I didn't ask, but you told me you're doing well, yeah
Any way to control me, uh
Making up feelings you never felt

You take all your issues
Blame 'em on everyone else
I'll bet that if you
Could, you'd
Go on a date with yourself

Oh, you think that you're so f*cking cool (so cool)
Got a new girl and some new tattoos
Yeah, way too f*cking cool (too cool)
But all your best friends really hate you too

Every time I hear your name, why's it make me sick?
Ooh, it's driving me insane that I'm not over it
I can't seem to get away from you (from you)
I would say, "hi", but you're way too f*cking cool

I can't believe you made me think
Something so good could last
Stupid me
Was so naïve to think you'd ever come back

Oh, you think that you're so f*cking cool (so cool)
Got a new girl and some new tattoos
Yeah, way too f*cking cool (too cool)
But all your best friends really hate you too

Every time I hear your name, why's it make me sick? (why's it make me sick?)
Ooh, it's driving me insane that I'm not over it (that I'm not over it)
I can't seem to get away from you (from you)
I would say, "hi", but you're way too f*cking cool

Usually never cry at all
I would say I'm pretty tough
But it's been a couple weeks now
And I still feel stuck in my lungs
And usually I go out on nights
And not think of you once
But if they start playin' that song
I can't help but to think about us, oh

Really thought I'd be done with the hardest part
When I pulled myself out of your arms
Wish I knew that was only the start
And now I'm fallin' apart 'cause

Last night for the very first time
You didn't even try to call
Oh, I won't lie, I thought I might die
I couldn't even sleep at all
And maybe I'll get used to it (ah, ah)
But right now I just feel like shit (ah, ah)
Oh, oh

So I kissed somebody else
Just to see how it felt
But all that was goin' through my brain
Was your hands around my waist
You know how to do it so well

Really thought I was done with the hardest part
When I pulled myself out of your arms
Wish I knew that was only the start
And now I'm fallin' apart 'cause

Last night for the very first time
You didn't even try to call (you didn't even try to call)
Oh, I won't lie, I thought I might die
I couldn't even sleep at all
And maybe I'll get used to it (ah, ah)
But right now I just feel like shit (ah, ah)
Oh, oh

Now if I get a little too drunk
I'll start thinkin', "What if you were the one?"
I know that the damage is done
And I still have the shirt that you wore
When we first met, it's there on the floor
I might kick it under the bed
Hopin' that I could forget that

Last night for the very first time
You didn't even try to call
Oh, I won't lie, I thought I might die
I couldn't even sleep at all
And maybe I'll get used to it (ah, ah)
But right now I just feel like shit (ah, ah)
Oh, oh

(Used to it)
(Feel like shit)

You say I should be on top of the world but I'm not feeling much
You know I used to think I could fly, now I'm just holding on
Yeah, I'm laughing in a room full of strangers on the verge of tears
Ooh, I should be on top of the world but yet I'm right here

Oh, 'cause every time you look at me it's never enough for you
You can't be fair to me 'cause, boy, you know I'm so damn in love with you

Oh, I've been stuck seeing your face in everyone
Shouldn't have played in your game of fun
Now I don't think I'm okay
You never go away
Oh, enjoy the show
You seem to love when I'm alone
You like to care until you don't
Now I don't think I'm okay
You never go away, oh

(Oh)

I should be on top of the world but I've been falling down
And each day gets a little bit worse when you're not around
Was driving and I thought that I saw you and I almost crashed
The sad part is if the roles were reversed you woulda drove right past

'Cause every time you look at me it's never enough for you
You can't be fair to me 'cause, boy, you know I'm so damn in love with you

Oh, I've been stuck seeing your face in everyone
Shouldn't have played in your game of fun
Now I don't think I'm okay
You never go away
Oh, enjoy the show
You seem to love when I'm alone
You like to care until you don't
Now I don't think I'm okay
You never go away, oh

Please just don't forget me
I can see you're empty
Please just don't forget me, babe

You stopped saying, "goodnight"
That was the first sign that you were letting go
Now you don't see me the same way
You're looking at me like I'm only getting old

And I
Shoulda known
That you were only scared to be alone

I couldn't say much
I was distracted
You seemed so anxious like you had something to hide

Tell me, "it's nothing"
I don't believe you
I know that look you get when you're about to lie

I feel so stupid, mm
'Cause I still say, "goodnight"

I always tried to impress you
Got so dressed up and you never seemed to care
Your ridiculous expectations
Lack of validation, was never f*cking fair

And I
Shoulda known
That you were only scared to be alone

I couldn't say much
I was distracted
You seemed so anxious like you had something to hide

Tell me, "it's nothing"
I don't believe you
I know that look you get when you're about to lie

I feel so stupid, mm
'Cause I still say, "goodnight"