Subsistence - Feel Alive (feat. Mike Degn) Lyrics

After all this time
And all that's passed me by
Hiding in my mind
I don't feel alive

I subsist on the sidelines
Watching the world go by
And I just want to die
Cause I don't feel alive
Too afraid to try
A coward deep inside
This self destructive mind

Numb and uninspired
I can't seem to smile
It won't reach my eyes
Yet I still can't seem to cry

I subsist on the sidelines
Watching the world go by
And I just want to die
Cause I don't feel alive
Too afraid to try
A coward deep inside
This self destructive mind

Sometimes I can't decide
If I keep telling myself lies
To buy some more time
To save my wasted life
Or just give up the fight
I feel so dead inside
Dead inside

Trauma takes its toll
Drags me down below
Like it did before
And it seems I'm doomed to fall

I subsist on the sidelines
Watching the world go by
And I just want to die
Cause I don't feel alive
Too afraid to try
A coward deep inside
This self destructive mind

And all I know
Is that I'm all alone
I regret it all
Giving in to the storm
After all I asked for
I closed the door
On my own art
And my own heart
Lost in my head
With my demons again
I wish I were dead
I wish I were dead
I'm fading away
Another wasted day
I wish I could change
I wish I could change

I subsist on the sidelines
I don't feel alive
All I do is fight
To keep this all inside
And try not to lose my mind
Lose my mind