Excuse me, girl
I know it's a bit embarrassing
But I just noticed some tan lines on your shirt
See, I reckon you're about an eight or a nine
Maybe even nine and a half in four beers' time
That blue Topshop top you've got on is nice
Bit too much fake tan, though, but yeah, you score high
But there's just one little thing that's really, really
Really, really annoying me about you, you see
Yeah, yeah, like I said, you are really fit
But my gosh, don't you just know it?
I'm not trying to pull you
Even though I would like to
I think you are really fit
You're fit, but my gosh, don't you know it?
So when I looked at you standing there with your horde
I was waiting in the queue, looking at the board
Wondering whether to have a burger or chips
Or what the shrapnel in my back pocket could afford
When I noticed out the corner of my eye
Looking toward my direction, your eyes locked onto my course
I couldn't concentrate on what I wanted to order
Which lost me my place in the queue I waited for, yeah
I'm not trying to pull you
Even though I would like to
I think you are really fit
You're fit, but my gosh, don't you know it?
(Whoa! Leave it out)
Are you smoking crack or something?
Mike, just leave it, just leave it
We cannot have that behaviour in this establishment
It's not worth it, Mike, just leave it
Don't touch me
It's not worth it
Don't touch me, look, I'm alright, don't touch me
For a while there I was thinking, yeah, but, what if?
Picturing myself pulling with bare white hot wit
Snaring you as you were standing there opposite
Whether or not you knew it, I swear you didn't tick
And when that bloke in the white behind us lot queuing
Was clocking onto you, too, yeah, I had to admit
That yeah, yeah, you are fit and yeah, I do want it
But I stop sharking a minute to get chips and drinks
I'm not trying to pull you
Even though I would like to
I think you are really fit
You're fit, but my gosh, don't you know it?
Now, I bashed my head hard earlier due to the brew
But I am digressing slightly, so I'll continue
I didn't want to bowl over all geezer and rude
Not rude like good but just rude like uncouth
You girls think you can just flirt and it comes to you
Well let me tell you, see, yes, yes, you are really rude
And rude as in good, I knew this as you stood and queued
But I just did not want to give the satisfaction to you
I'm not trying to pull you
Even though I would like to
I think you are really fit
You're fit, but my gosh, don't you know it?
And just as you started to make your big advance
With the milkshake and that little doughnut in hand
I was like, nah, I can't even though you look grand
But you look sharp there smiling hard suggesting and
Gleaming away with your hearty, hearty-looking tan
But I admit the next bit was spanner to my plan
You walked towards my path but just brushed right past
And into the arms of that f*cking white shirted man
I'm not trying to pull you
Even though I would like to
I think you are really fit
You're fit, but my gosh, don't you know it?
Oh, what do I give a f*ck? I've got a girlfriend anyway
We're all a bit drunk, we've had a few, fair play
I got this Stella I bummed from that last cafe
This night's not even begun, yes, yes, oh yay
I did fancy you a bit, though, yeah, I must say
I would rather I hadn't mugged myself on display
But this is just another case of female stopping play
In an otherwise total result of a holiday
I'm not trying to pull you
Even though I would like to
I think you are really fit
You're fit, but my gosh, don't you know it?
You're fit but you know it
But you know it
You're fit but you know it
I think I'm going to fall over
I think I'm going to fall o-
F*cking hell