When I was a girl
I did my best to hide
We all had to run for cover
From my father and his drunken pride
He'd leave us alone
But never for too long
He'd beat up on my mother
And tell us he'd be the only one
How could I learn to love
From somebody so abusive?
I pulled back and went away
To nurse my hearts bruises
Today I got the news
That his heart gave out
I know I'll never have another
But what father darkens his own house?
Well I heard what they say
That family's not for choosing
Is closure real?
Will I find peace?
Or is it just an illusion
All I know is it's on me
To battle on even in my grief
We can't decide who lives or dies
It's a cold cold sword
It's a closing door
And what could have been with time on my side
It's a bright red sound
And try as I might to shut it all out
Now I see that life is all mine
He always let me know
How I let him down
It's so painful to remember
But it's all the same and he's not around