Helpless. Video (MV)

Really high hopes where we started out baby
Had you right next to me thinking we were crazy
Falling for each other seemed to shady
Way to easy to believe it was real lately
But what a roller coaster of emotion we would feel
Damn these emotions feeling like a potion
Didn't know where it was really going
Knew you were special
So I was all in
Helpless helpless I'm coming off as selfish
Struggling with my time just working on my wellness
Selfish selfish coming off as helpless
Working on my mind hoping I'm not jealous
Don't know what to do don't know if I can help it
I'm reckless reckless
Feeling like I'm lost
Got my freedom but at what cost
Feeling like I'm moving but not on
Who'd of ever thought that we'd end up here
Certainly not me and not this year
You're the only one that I really ever wanted
F*cked up now
Feeling like I'm haunted
Need you on my damn life
Looking like I should've wifed
All the nights that I'm sleeping right next to fives
Missing you more than I ever thought that I would
Not gonna reach out even though I could
Hurting in this moment feeling lost (Feeling lost)
Trying to f*ckin' act like I'm the boss (I'm the boss)
But in reality I'm at a loss
For my words
For my hurt
For my pain
It's absurd
I am hurting
It's a burden
Feeling like I'm not a person
Helpless helpless I'm coming off as selfish
Struggling with my time just working on my wellness
Selfish selfish coming off as helpless
Working on my mind hoping I'm not jealous
Don't know what to do don't know if I can help it
I'm reckless reckless
Feeling like I'm lost
Feelin' all this pressure
Should've never left her
Coming back out of fear or is it love
Got you back now on the ultimate wave
How could I know I was digging my grave
Seeing red flags but thinking we were great
Time keeps moving and feelings start to fade
Not for me but the one that got away
Now she gets even doing what I did
Leaving me for mystery guess this knife is two-sided
Falling more broken than I could've thought
Going past rock bottom with no idea how
Feeling emotionless asking myself "what now?"
Climbing outta this hole I dug myself into
You need more than a shovel to discover what I've been through
Helpless helpless I'm coming off as selfish
Struggling with my time just working on my wellness
Selfish selfish coming off as helpless
Working on my mind hoping I'm not jealous
Don't know what to do don't know if I can help it
I'm reckless reckless
Feeling like I'm lost
Beyond devastated
Thought we could've made it
F*cked it all up
Now you end up hating
Did things that I thought would've helped me
Turned out to be little more than a distraction
You found out didn't have a good reaction
Least I knew that you still cared for me
Now all I'm asking is
Where is she?