rest in peace Video (MV)

Late at night I turn the car stereo off, it's just me and the road
Me and my thoughts with no where to go
I'm too numb to drive but I have to clear my mind
I'm drinking as drown, smiling as I slowly die
In the lexus, took the keys from mom's purse
F*ck it, f*ck it, this is how much love hurts
This is how it has to go, anyway I'll ever learn
Staring at my rearview, watching all my bridges burn
Burn, burn, throw the ashes in an urn
Scream, crash, I just made the wrong turn
Head on collision that was my decision, I'll admitted
Now stuck in this position wishing that I never did it
F*ck, I can't move right now, lost in the past
I might lose right now, but for what
I don't know if I'll make it or not
Trying to keep my eyes open, all I can do is look up, f*ck
Yeah, I hear some people coming, hopefully they see me
Before it's too late, before I meet all of my demons, damn
The ones I heard are now crying for help
Calling out to anybody, somebody please help
I'm on the ground, so numb, so dumb, what have I done
Living in the moment 'cause you only live once that's for sure
Paramedics on the scene now, feelin like this a dream now, could it be
This whole time, the whole thing, was it me
Was it really me, I have to know, god please, am I died or asleep, damn
Car lost control, I just killed a man that I know
Think it might be safe assuming that I'm right
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Don't let go
Hold on, hold on
Hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on
Cold slopes, rainy days, turn to sleet
Find your light then find a path to find your dream
What's a life if in your life you die alone
Spread the word, tell a friend to grab ahold, yeah
Shit real these days, I don't really feel these days, I'm trapped nigga
A lot shit going on right now and it don't really help that I'm black nigga
Unit 4 at the f*cking door
Still mad about the dumb shit I did in my past
Gotta get it, had to switch up the plan, yeah
Back to what's real, back to the basics, back in the field mother f*cker
That's right, gotta climb, gotta reach new heights
Need a house in the hills mother f*cker
'Cause I felt the pain of everything and now I'm broke, I need a fix
I don't need the drugs, I need a hug, I need your love, I need your lips
Where are you at when I need you, this is the worse that could happen
Feeling like life is so worthless, now that my heart was just fractured, damn
Why we really just break like bread, how we even let it get like this
I ain't really for the shit like this, let me put it like this though
Taking shots, no pistol, I'm pissed off
F*ck life man, I'm driving but I drift off
Drinking to the death of me, rest in peace who I used to be, 'cause I'm not him no more
I don't really have friends no more, I don't really go outside
I don't do the things that I like 'cause I can't win no more
Life changes by seasons, this is my season, yeah
Winner gets everything, take it or leave it, take it or leave it
Life changes by seasons, this is my season, yeah
Winner gets everything, take it or leave it, take it or leave it
Back when I ain't work or have a job, when I was living off my mom
You would pay and I would lie, I would tell in due time
These things do take time, baby girl it's coming now
I just need you back around, please baby hold me down
Like this all I ever needed, all I ever wanted
You were so right, you were so honest, you kept it a hundred
Absence makes the heart grow founder, all's fair in love and war
Friends saying I was wrong, I'm the reason that you're gone
Going thru it again, like when mom and dad split, '06, oh shit, life's a bitch, couldn't sleep
I was nervous, damn
Could it be, was it me, who to blame, who the one that committed all these murders, me
Blood hands, I got blood conscious, uh
Blood on the glove, I got blood on my cotton
All on my carpet, yeah
Panic attacks, no pills, no chill
Loss appetite, no food, no meals, god damn
How the f*ck you think I feel, how the f*ck you think I feel, yeah
How the f*ck you think I feel, how the f*ck you think I feel right now
You gotta figure out what makes you happy