nothing,nowhere. - Reaper Album Lyrics

I swear that I'ma die in this basement
Isolation is the high that I'm chasing
Overdose on lonely nights that were wasted
I can feel the reaper close, I hear him pacing
The days roll by, nothing changes
Sunset, sunrise, losing patience
I'm too far gone, don't try to save me
I hate myself more than any man could ever hate me

Well alright, yeah
Well alright, alright, no, no
Well alright, I'ma fade into the night
Cut you straight out of my life, yeah
Well alright, yeah
Well alright, alright, no, no
Well alright, this is the last time you see me
Call me young Houdini

I'm cutting my ties, then I'm closing the blinds
And I'm shutting my eyes, yeah
'Cause life is a lie and I'm sick and I'm tired
Of the planet outside, I
Say that I'm fine, but you know that's a lie
And I mean it this time, yeah
I'm better alone, so don't hit up my phone
And I mean it
Disappear from the pain like I'm Dave Blaine
You don't know my name, you don't know me
'Cause I've been this way, keep it low key
Yeah, you don't know the first thing about me (yeah)
Abracadabra, I f*cked up my life
If I did it once, I'll do it twice
Probably better if you stay away
And for my final act I'll fade away

Well alright, yeah
Well alright, alright, no, no
Well alright, I'ma fade into the night
Cut you straight out of my life, yeah
Well alright, yeah
Well alright, alright, no, no
Well alright, this is the last time you see me
Call me young Houdini

I've been away, don't say my name
Cut it out, cut it out, oh no
And you can try but it's no use
Cut it out, cut it out, ayy

Well alright, yeah
Well alright, alright, no, no
Well alright, I'ma fade into the night
Cut you straight out of my life, yeah
Well alright, yeah
Well alright, alright, no, no
Well alright, this is the last time you see me
Call me young Houdini

Yo, get your ass up, let's go skate
Enough of these f*cking sad songs boy
Lets get on that Hot 97
What's Ebro gotta say?
But we gotta get some f*cking phat tracks, boy, you know
You out here with these straight bars bro
This Hot 97 with the Funkmaster Flex, baby

Not into playing games with these plain Janes
Either love me or leave me, the same thing
I can still feel the pain lingering from 5th grade
Young misfit with the KR3W brand slim fits
Give a f*ck about a Soundcloud rapper
Give 'em two years and the clout won't matter
And I hate it so I'm lurking in the shadows
See you rocking Gucci but you look like an asshole

So what if I died, would you even cry?
Would you weep, would you keep it all inside?
Would you reminisce back on my life?
Would you forgive me for all of my lies?
So what if I died, would you even cry?
Would you weep, would you keep it all inside?
Would you reminisce back on my life?
Would you forgive me for all of my lies?

I like to fantasize my funeral while I'm stuck inside my cubicle
Think of everyone I hate, they say my life was beautiful
Think of everyone who ever let me read a eulogy
Try to say they sorry that they missed the opportunity, 'cause
I can't even act like I'm okay
Try to get me to socialize, that's a no way
They say the grass is greener on the other side
I seen it with my eyes, you must be color blind

So what if I died, would you even cry?
Would you weep, would you keep it all inside?
Would you reminisce back on my life?
Would you forgive me for all of my lies?
So what if I died, would you even cry?
Would you weep, would you keep it all inside?
Would you reminisce back on my life?
Would you forgive me for all of my lies?

So what if I died, would you even cry?
Would you weep, would you keep it all inside?
Would you reminisce back on my life?
Would you forgive me for all of my lies?
So what if I died, would you even cry?
Would you weep, would you keep it all inside?
Would you reminisce back on my life?
Would you forgive me for all of my lies?

Yeah, I don't f*ck with society
I just feel like it's a lie to me
Feel the resentment inside of me
I could feel the reaper trying me
I could never be the nice guy
I could never see the bright side
'Cause we all gotta ride in the hearses
So I don't really see the purpose
Rollin' round in the Subie
Way back when you knew me
Things change and I'm growing up
They keep telling me I'm blowing up
It's been a minute, I've been around
I've been alone and it's funny how
That every day when I leave the house
I wish that I hadn't, and I'm leaving now

Cold blood, black heart
I can see the lies in your eyes
And it's hard
To act like I'm fine
Know I've seen better times
I think I've had it
I think I've had it

You're just another reason why I stay inside
Just another reason why I hate this life
This has been a long time coming, I swear
This has been a long time coming, I swear
And I can't seem to let go of the hate inside
Every time I'm close you go and change my mind
This has been a long time coming, I swear
This has been a long time coming, I swear

Motorola Razr, kept that shit on my waist
Haven't felt alive since 2008
Got the doors locked and the blinds closed
F*ck your fake fame and your nice clothes
Looking around I can only see
All of the demons around me
Do what you do, it's astounding
Losing my grip and I'm drowning
Same shit, different day
I'm insane, stay away
I can see, all the lies
Cutting ties, too late

Cold blood, black heart
I can see the lies in your eyes
And it's hard
To act like I'm fine
Know I've seen better times
I think I've had it
I think I've had it

You're just another reason why I stay inside
Just another reason why I hate this life
This has been a long time coming, I swear
This has been a long time coming, I swear
And I can't seem to let go of the hate inside
Every time I'm close you go and change my mind
This has been a long time coming, I swear
This has been a long time coming, I swear, yeah

Cold blood, black heart
I can see the lies in your eyes
And it's hard
To act like I'm fine
Know I've seen better times
I think I've had it
I think I've had it, yeah
Cold blood, black heart
I can see the lies in your eyes
And it's hard
To act like I'm fine
Know I've seen better times
I think I've had it
I think I've had it

You're just another reason why I stay inside
Just another reason why I hate this life
This has been a long time coming, I swear
This has been a long time coming, I swear
And I can't seem to let go of the hate inside
Every time I'm close you go and change my mind
This has been a long time coming, I swear
This has been a long time coming, I swear, yeah

Tell me all your secrets
And I swear I'll keep them safe
I'm a f*cking nightmare
But you love me just the same
But did something change?
'Cause the way that you say my name's not the same
And it's all my fault, I swear I dug my grave
I wanna feel something again
I wanna feel anything at all

Marykate, I'm sorry that I let you down again
Marykate, I'm sorry that I let you down

And I'm trying to be
The person that you want me to be
But I'm not sure if I can meet those needs
And I, I wish that I was anyone but me
Like on the TV screen or in the magazines

Marykate, I'm sorry that I let you down again
Marykate, I'm sorry that I let you down

When I think of love I see your face
But when I think of you I think of pain
My heart and mind are not on the same page
It's obvious I get carried away
All of the things that I don't know
All of the feelings I don't show
My mind doesn't know where to go tho
Got me standing in place like a photo
But I know you don't know
I should know by now
That every time that I make up my mind
And you know it's too late, 'cause I ran outta time
And you know it

Now it's 3AM and I'm on the phone
Checking on your page while I'm all alone
You'd think I'd learn or I'd try to change
Why does this always end the same?

I'm tired of falling out of love
I'm tired of the rise and fall
I'll leave before it starts
'Cause I don't wanna get my hopes up
I'm tired of falling out of love
I'm tired of the rise and fall
I'll leave before it starts
'Cause I don't wanna get my hopes up

[Dashboard Confessional]
I play it all inside my head so I remember
I think about the way we were back in November
Every moment that I waste on holding out for one more chance
Isn't worth the pain I hold so close to me
Wish I could forget it all

Now it's 3AM and I'm on the phone
Checking on your page while I'm all alone
You'd think I'd learn or I'd try to change
Why does this always end the same?

I'm tired of falling out of love
I'm tired of the rise and fall
I'll leave before it starts
'Cause I don't wanna get my hopes up
I'm tired of falling out of love
I'm tired of the rise and fall
I'll leave before it starts
'Cause I don't wanna get my hopes up

I'd rather sleep alone than play this game again
I'd rather play it safe than feel the pain again
And I just know by now how this will end up
Maybe it's you or maybe I'm the one who's f*cked up
I'd rather sleep alone than play this game again
I'd rather play it safe than feel the pain again
And I just know by now how this will end up
Maybe it's you or maybe I'm the one who's f*cked up

I'm tired of falling out of love
I'm tired of the rise and fall
I'll leave before it starts
'Cause I don't wanna get my hopes up
I'm tired of falling out of love
I'm tired of the rise and fall
I'll leave before it starts
'Cause I don't wanna get my hopes up

Waking up at the crack of noon
Reminiscing of the times I'm waking up with you
I should leave, sell my shit, make some kind of moves
I'm lying to myself, I never leave this f*cking room
I got a pile of shit I haven't addressed, head is a mess
Check the script bottle, see if any are left
There's nothing, nowhere, but let's not even go there
I'm lucky if I wake up, let alone care
'Cause there's a fine line from who I am and who I wanna be
I'm amazed at what I find when I look within honestly
Honestly, feels like I'm waiting to die
Watch the days pass by, what's it mean to be alive?
And I've been killing time, go to bed with the sunrise
I got this feeling I won't make it to twenty-five
It's a far cry, know we've all got hard times
But these long nights got me feeling like I wanna die

Leave my body by the liquor store
I'm an asshole, let me die slow
It's too late for me, can't you f*cking see
I dug my own grave, let me f*cking be
Leave my body by the liquor store
I'm an asshole, let me die slow
It's too late for me, can't you f*cking see
I dug my own grave, let me f*cking be

Don't even try to feed me all that "life is what you make it"
Pull up to your 9-to-5 and smile or try to fake it
But when you're in your bed alone I know you f*cking face it
One day you'll meet your maker and you'll see your life was wasted
The reaper creeping slow, I know you see him when you dreaming
You posted at a party but he's in the dark scheming
And you keep telling me that life has some sort of meaning
So sorry if I'm pessimistic but I don't believe it

I'm a f*ck up, motherf*cker
I'm sick of tryna find myself in others
I'm sick of seeking love, I'd rather suffer
I'm sick of life, I put that on my mother
Yeah I'm a f*ck up, motherf*cker
I needed you, you left me in the gutter
The saddest part is that I really loved her
On a sinking ship, I wave as I go under

Leave my body by the liquor store
I'm an asshole, let me die slow
It's too late for me, can't you f*cking see
I dug my own grave, let me f*cking be
Leave my body by the liquor store
I'm an asshole, let me die slow
It's too late for me, can't you f*cking see
I dug my own grave, let me f*cking be

I'm a f*ck up, motherf*cker
I'm sick of tryna find myself in others
I'm sick of seeking love, I'd rather suffer
I'm sick of life, I put that on my mother
Yeah I'm a f*ck up, motherf*cker
I needed you, you left me in the gutter
The saddest part is that I really loved her
On a sinking ship, I wave as I go under

I'm the light on your shed
Shining through your bedroom window
Keeping you awake
I'm the thoughts in your head
I'm every word you never said
Keeping you awake
Remember me with a smile on my face
So when I'm gone you can know I'm in a better place

I'm not so sure
About anything anymore
I guess I got what I asked for
I've been so sore
From always sleeping on the floor
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna do this anymore

What's the point of waking up?
Why can't I give a f*ck?
How can I see the bright side
With the blinds closed and I'm stuck?
They say I'll get it when I'm older
Well, I'm getting close and no closure
Now I'm feeling like it's over
We don't even have to go there
Like damn
Look at my life
Tell me why I can't do anything right
Don't wanna complain so I keep it inside
Losing my mind, wide awake every night
Remember the days at that old cul-de-sac
Feel like that shit was a dream looking back
Now I can't help that I live in the past where nothing will last

I'm not so sure
About anything anymore
I guess I got what I asked for
I've been so sore
From always sleeping on the floor
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna do this anymore

I'm not so sure
About anything anymore
I guess I got what I asked for
I've been so sore
From always sleeping on the floor
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna do this anymore