Nelson Mendoza - Family Lyrics

You only family when it's convince, I know you don't give a f*ck about my inner demons
You just want someone to talk to, how about you turn to your inner demons
The only time I could really feel is during the winter season
We might be family but your mind ain't season
Dead on the inside, there is no need for me to be finning
Why you leaving
Acting like you give a f*ck when we all know you need a reason to feel important, nigga I ain't your reason
Now you leaving
You can't really handle real shit, no wonder why there's different seasons
I only reside in one cause the light at the end of the tunnel ain't gleaming
Why you look for my tears to find meaning
Why you nodding at my wording acting you know what I'm meaning
I ain't depressed I'm just compressing demons
The only time you see my soul is when my tears is fleeing from my sockets, no bitch the sun ain't beaming
I'm your ray of sunlight when your soul need cleaning

I'm going through shit too, you never really hear my words
Can't get thru, like a drive-by am I just a drive-thru
Only stop to hear a script, do you know what I been through
You want me to explain but then act like you always knew

Do I love a lot for my own good
Would I rather give more than consume my own goods
I know sometimes I could be selfish but my ego is telling me it's for my own good
Am I good, or deep down I been engulfed in evil
I know I'm poor but my mind ain't feeble
I be thinking about manipulation but I ain't no weasel
Do I just want money or the accompaniment of power
Do I just want to be faded so I could feel like I've been running shit for 72 within 24 hours
Why she dressing nice knowing at the end of the night the sweat in not gonna make her smell like flowers
I could see past their disguise, they just want a taste of power
They not around you when you low, I thought my depression was ours
What's mine is yours, we two different types of highs in the same hour
I like to go lower cause I told death I ain't no coward
Depression hitting me hard, so tell me whose the real coward

You want me to explain, then act like you always knew