Mask - ADDICTION Lyrics

I'm too young to be this jaded
I'm too old to be this mad
Make mistakes and get frustrated
I'm too young to be this sad
I don't need words of wisdom
I know that there's a limit
I'm no stranger to addiction
So sometimes just quit it
The more you tell me no
The more my habits grow
Reaching for another bottle
Drink until I start to wobble
Take pills to feel alive
And with others I know they've died
Were more stupid than I am
And you're afraid that I am
Gonna end up the same
But at the end of the day
Who is really there to say
We'll all see tomorrow's face
It's not promised now is it
And you say I'm trying to fit in
That's the farthest thing from the truth
I'm trying my hardest to quit this
And each time I look in the mirror
I'm f*cking drugged up
Hate what I see when I'm sober
Would rather stay f*cked up
Only time I love myself
Is when I don't know myself
To my son and daughters
I hope that I'm there to tell you about myself
Once I get to feeling well
Come back into your lives
I hope you'll see the pain in my eyes
I love you guys
I'm too young to be this jaded
I'm too old to be this mad
Make mistakes and get frustrated
I'm too young to be this sad
What up, mom
I can't see you, I can't hear you
What the f*ck, mom
You can't see me, you can't hear me
What the f*ck, mom
And you thought you were so strong
You couldn't die of some, but you were dead wrong
They said I'd feel the pain later
Two years and all I feel is anger
Should have died a mom and not a stranger
Your obituary in the paper was true
It sparked a lot of hate, but f*ck all of them too
And all these years later, I'm becoming like you
The apple doesn't fall from the tree
The saying is true
And all these things I'm mixing are dangerous
Woo, yeah
And I'm just so f*cking enthused
I look over here and I want to try that
Then I think about you and then I fight back
The urge to follow through with any plans that I have
Is taken away, so I wear a broken mask
Yeah, born with it
In my system so symbolic
I'm so twisted
Just like you it's so violent
I hate living
Because of you
I'm so different
Not in a good way
Makes every day feel
Like a game of scrimmage
I f*cking hate it
Every day my head racing
I try patience
They try me, I ain't winning
I get faded
Just to try and slow it down
I get wasted
Just so I can f*cking pass out
I get so depressed
That I try to kill myself
And dad ain't like that
So I gotta blame you
If it ain't that, I guess we gotta catch 22
You're the one with the issues, so it makes sense too
Just saying what I gotta say
Gotta get it out my brain
Gotta get it out my way
It's taking up too much space
I ain't mad at you
I'm just disappointed
Don't know if you can hear me or not
Just want you to know that
I'm too young to be this jaded
I'm too old to be this mad
Make mistakes and get frustrated
I'm too young to be this sad