Lately, I've been hanging with a brand new kind of crowd,
Down at Bobby's Ballroom where the lonely go to drown.
I was trying to forget you with a glass of hard-luck wine,
When who should come through that door, but an old-time friend of mine.
Mr. Memory, meet Mr. Bottle.
He's the only true friend I've ever known.
Mr. Bottle, meet Mr. Memory.
He's the kind of friend that just won't leave you alone.
Mr. Bottle don't remind me of all the things that I do wrong
All the things that you tell me are the reasons the you stay gone.
Mr. Memory, he don't care about me or my lonesome crew
All he wants to brag about, is why I can't have you.
Mr. Memory, meet Mr. Bottle.
He's the only true friend I've ever known.
Mr. Bottle, meet Mr. Memory.
He's the kind of friend that just won't leave you alone.