Down Video (MV)

I'm down today
And it would be so easy to say I don't know why
But I do
And it would be so easy to just blindly deny

Maybe it's that I'm tired
Maybe it's that I'm under the weather
Maybe it's because I'm trying so hard to hold it all together
Maybe it's because I never feel like I have any control
Maybe it's that I've buried my soul
Under a blanket of bitterness

A thousand piece puzzle missing a hundred pieces
And it should be so obvious where I left them
And yet they hang out there hidden in plain sight
As my unwillingness to face what I see bends the light

I'm down today
And it would be so easy not to look in the mirror for reasons
But I will
And it would be so easy to see the worst in me

Am I a good person? Am I being unfair?
Or am I just punishing myself for years of inaction in any direction?
Is there something I'm supposed to find?
Because I'm searching so damn hard but I just feel blind
Why the regret? Why the bitterness?
My mind knows this is wasted energy but my heart goes its own way
Is my anger and resentment really pointed outward
Or is all this emotion my unwillingness to forgive myself?

I'm down today
And it's because I see that I have to shed the veil of denial
So I will
And try to make sense of the emotions bubbling out of me