laggie - LOCKDOWN Lyrics

They think I'm not here
But all of this time
I've been holding my fears
I cover my ears
Destruction is near
All that I hear is water come down as my tears
I've seen my friends get twisted
I've heard your secrets as whispers
I've felt your soul as you listened
My songs got you as my witness
No faith
That's what you get when you trust in yourself
Cause all that I see is shit for myself
I don't don't wanna see it, I know that I fell
I know that I fell
My secrets came out on that day as well
But I couldn't share, the way that I felt
Yeah you, ey
You got me to lie, that's not who I am
Yeah all that I tried, was let you divide
Your life and what's mine, the goal that I had
Was let you move in and hear me out
I opened my heart and you threw me out
Thinking that's fair will make you throw up
Someday you'll find out I'm not just that guy
I'm not just that guy
I got a few reasons to feel like I'm not
Like every few days I go out for a ride
I finish it up, I'm cleanin' it up
Get down from my wheels and I feel like a dream
It must be the lockdown
Every day's feeling the same
I don't see a way to get out out my head
Every day it's the lockdown, my lockdown
All that is left is a feeling of holding your hand
Not doing my best, why do I feel like in prison when I'm in my bed?
I wanna escape, be there, I wanna be great but I can't
What happened to me?
Yeah, my face and my body feels weak
No one to believe in me, yeah
I'm missing a person to tell me I'm more than I can see
My heartbeat, a drumbeat
I'm lacking a reason to leap to the streets
You see, I've been wishing for something or someone to make me complete
Now get back to me, give life back to me
I want to get rid of my needs
You're more than I, could ever need, you made me bleed
You made me plead for my place
And how can you say that you don't like my face?
All that I did was put you on my stage
I'm staying in lockdown where you're locked up
In my head you're all that's left
See?
Everything's there for a reason
We f*ck up, then we make it up, it doesn't have to be treason
I thought you'd be back in a season
Now you, me, and the lockdown are stuck in a threesome
Bet you don't have to be decent
Jesus
You're losing attention, I want you to focus on me when I'm talking
I spit on this track, I go "f*ck it", you hear that below?
Ey, that's my kick knocking
I see your reaction, this ain't no distraction
I'm losing connection and that's for protection
You hear what I say?
Looking around, picking up people and making selections
That's me, ey, yeah, oh
When I grow I wanna be an MC
Everyone just looking at me
Everyone wanna be like me
Imma teach em', yeah, yeah, but I got no time for the nonsense
Get out from here if you don't get the concept
Get out of here if you're lacking the content, no
I never get time for my conscience
I never get time for my
Conscience
Find that funny? Locked down, still no time for nothin'
Like a bird trapped, in my cage I'm, feel the weight and it's so heavy
So steady, f*ck my aim I'm so ready
Got my gun out, 'bout to shoot now, no more warning man
Head's about to be nothing more than
A piece of fruit in the ceiling, I'm stuck I don't know what I'm feeling
Hands shaking, trigger waiting, in my lockdown I'm devastated
Help me out or I'll blow my brains out
Guess that no one is calling back now
Hope you get this letter, right?
Please know that I've never been sick dad