1988 Album Lyrics by Lori McKenna

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The Old Woman In Me

The old woman in me thinks I look good in these jeans
She remembers what her body did carrying all those kids
She's narrowed down the truth, she don't even dye her roots
She's proud of the life she lived, says it made her the woman she is

The old woman in me, she don't wanna go back in time
Thinks her fifties might have been her prime, says, "Don't give up on that man of mine"
She's good at listening, says, "Kiss him every time a kid walks in"
Remember what your heart is for and you won't have to ask for more

She's a no-regretter
Yeah, a good forgiver
Yeah, well, she's worn around the edges
Go on and let her be
She's peace in a house dress
I'm a work in progress
I hope someday I get to be the old woman in me

The old woman in me never made herself an enemy
Took a while and finally found her faith, says, "Everybody makes mistakes"
She'll smile and look you in the eye, say I love you too many times
Yeah, but she don't apologize for all that love

She's a no-regretter
Yeah, a good forgiver
Yeah, well, she's worn around the edges
Go on and let her be
She's peace in a house dress
And I'm a work in progress
I hope someday I get to be the old woman in me, yeah

The old woman in me sits on a front porch swing
Watching her grandkids play, dreaming 'bout yesterday, yesterday

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Happy Children

In this life there's no guarantees right from the very start
Takes all the blood inside your veins, all the kindness in your heart
Don't ask the moon how high you are, he's always looking down
Don't sit in the dark too long, sit in the sun when it comes out

We all meet some funny birds up there in the by and by
Can't make them all love you, there's no need to wonder why
When you're young you wanna be old, when you're old you wanna be young
I wish you all the best in case this life's the only one

I hope you find your true north
I hope you make some dreams come true
I hope you learn early that the love you give all comes right back to you
I hope you get up every time you fall
And you get back in again
But if you only get one thing that's a given
I hope you have happy children

I hope you forgive your parents for the ways they messed you up
I hope some of that was just their way of trying to show you love
I bet part of you is still that kid staring at your bedroom wall
Wondering how the world's so big and why you feel so small

I hope you find your true north
I hope you make some dreams come true
I hope you learn early that the love you give all comes right back to you
I hope you get up every time you fall
And you get back in again
But if you only get one thing that's a given
I hope you have happy children
Happy children

I hope you got some money in a mattress and a roof over your head
And every other thing that you ever need is right inside your chest
We might be all a little lost on this great big ball we're spinning on
We're probably just a speck of dust, that's why I hope we all

Find our true north
And make some dreams come true
I hope you learn early that the love you give all comes right back to you
I hope you get up every time you fall
And you get back in again
But if you only get one thing that's a given
If you only get one thing that's a given
I hope you have happy children
Happy children
I hope you have happy children

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Killing Me

You and your umbrella, you're always ready
Every day storming up in your mind
I am your shelter, my love is steady
But damn, my heart is getting tired

Of trying to hold it all together
Trying to make up your weather

Would it kill you to be happy?
Would it kill you to be happy?
Would it kill you to be happy?
'Cause trying to make you happy
Trying to make you happy is killing me
Killing me

You know how to find the stone-cold darkness
Even when the stars are shining at night
You always see the glass half empty
Even when I'm always pouring, pouring the wine

Would it kill you to be happy?
Would it kill you to be happy?
Would it kill you to be happy?
'Cause trying to make you happy
Trying to make you happy is killing me
Killing me

Don't you ever kind of wonder
Wonder what it might be like

Would it kill you to be happy?
Would it kill you to be happy?
Would it kill you to be happy?
'Cause trying to make you happy
Trying to make you happy is killing me
Is killing me
Trying to make you happy is killing me
Trying to make you happy
Trying to make you happy is killing me
Is killing me

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Days Are Honey

Headlights rolling down the road
Pull me in nice and slowly
Take me with you where you go
For another go-round, go-round

Every night can't be like this
You spin the wheel 'cause you can't resist
It's a hard turn and a hell of a cliff
So, baby, don't look down

We unfold the wings, we plant our feet
And all that sting, all the bittersweet
If love remains, if you still love me
Some days are dirt, some days are honey

It's human nature either way
If you go or if he stays, so
Take the picture, change the frame
It gets better when you're looking back on it

Fields of gold and ripped-up jeans
Running short on gasoline
When you think that you know everything
Ain't the beauty in what you don't?

We unfold the wings, we plant our feet
And all that sting, all the bittersweet
If love remains, if you still want me
Some days are dirt, some days are honey

Some days are dust, some days are diamonds
Some days are fallen, some days are flying
Some days are broke, some days are money
Some days are dirt, some days are honey

We unfold the wings, we plant our feet
And all that sting, all the bittersweet
If love remains, if you still love me
Some days are dirt, some days are honey

Some days are honey
Some days are honey
Some days are honey

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1988

That old house on tattooed skin
At the end of the road where it began
We were too dumb to know we didn't know anything
Too young for making those plans

Would've all went to hell if not for you
I guess those storms made us weatherproof
That's where I was born and that's just the truth
I promise you ever since then

I've been thanking God for the plans He made
And looking back on those early days
Between playing house and praying for grace
I hope you understand
I've been your biggest fan
Since 1988, 1988

Oil stains on that old driveway
Overtime and bills we couldn't pay
One on the hip and one on the way
Smiling in the TV light

I held you all tight, one at a time
Every beat of your heart, I felt inside mine
It's all wrapped up in the days gone by
You taught me everything that I know

So I'm thanking God for the plans He made
And looking back on those early days
Half scared to death, half stupid brave
I hope you understand
I've been your biggest fan
Since 1988, 1988

We left our names in fresh concrete
Wrestled angels in summer feet
Glory days down that side street
Those years made him, those years made me

Thanking God for the plans He made
And soaking in these dreams we chase
Between growing up and standing right here today
I hope you understand
I've been your biggest fan
Since 1988, 1988
I've been your biggest fan
Since 1988

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Growing Up

Backyard dirt in our veins
Blood of Christ, Sunday morning clothes
We were coming of age
In the way, way back of a station wagon
Breathing secondhand smoke

Ash trays in the kitchen sink
Oprah's on the big TV at four
Barbie clothes in a Crown Royal bag
Jesus in the living room
Mama's locked her bedroom door

When the way it was wasn't what it seemed
Lemonade stand summers, prom king working at the Dairy Queen
All the stars we hung above those small-town trees
Young hearts still unbroken, flies by before you know it
You move on just the way time does
Till something brings you right back
To growing up, growing up

Church field, travel carnival
I'll meet you at the Ferris wheel at ten
We'll step across that line, just as far as we can go
Before it's our turn to see how big the real world is

When the way it was wasn't what it seemed
Making out in backseats behind the Dairy Queen
All the stars we hung above those small-town trees
Young hearts trying to out run 'em
Promise we don't become 'em
Just move on the way time does
Till something brings you right back
To growing up, growing up

Now you're six years sober
Taking your mother to her treatments
She says she wants to see the old house one more time
And you can't go back any more than she can go back
And if you said you didn't miss it, you'd be lying

When the way it was wasn't what it seemed
Maybe you could trade that freedom back for some of that naive
All the stars we hung above those small-town trees
Maybe they can remind you
I bet they'd recognize you
You think you moved on but no one really does
Just like no one tells you it'll be this tough, this tough
Growing up, growing up

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Wonder Drug

Shakespeare in study hall
Percocet and some Adderall
Doctor called it a wonder drug
Ripped a page from the Book of Job

I remember you innocent
Now all you are is bones and skin
With your father's temperament
Still paying off that original sin
And it never gets easier

Remember, we had it all planned out
A fenced-in yard, a job and some kids
How dare you leave me high and dry now
Thinking somehow, it was something I did
It's a monster, I know it, its fangs started showing
Took more than I ever could give
Why couldn't love be the wonder drug?

It's the straw and the camel's back
I'm so angry and I feel bad
Was it God or your parents
Or the small town that raised you?
I held your face in my hands
But I still couldn't break through

Remember, we had it all planned out
A fenced-in yard, a job and some kids
How dare you leave me high and dry now
Thinking somehow it was something I did
It's a monster, I know it, its fangs started showing
Grabs hold with the hand that it gives
Why couldn't love be the wonder drug?

Why couldn't you run to love?
Why couldn't you run to love?

I wasn't paying attention when
The roof was steady, the walls came in
Blue-collar life and all its weight
I was right there and I was too late
I was too late
I was too late, too late

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The Town In Your Heart

I wasn't ready to say goodbye, goodbye
I wasn't ready to let go when you let go
You don't have to keep me in your mind, in your mind
Just keep me in your blood and in your bones

Where there's an old white church and a Dairy Freeze
A borrowed car and a field of dreams
Go on and take me with you wherever you are
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart

You were taillights on the highway, flying
Searching for something nobody ever, ever finds
And I'd go back if I had my way, and I'd make
Those demons that were haunting you wish they had never tried

Just put me on the front porch swing smelling Sunday supper
You know that old A-frame with the pale blue shutters
Go on and take me with you wherever you are
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart

You're in my heart now, no matter what
You're in the dark now and I can't touch you
You're in my heart now, the deepest part now
The deepest part, no matter what

So go on and take me with you wherever you are
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart
I hope I live on a road in the town in your heart

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Letting People Down

Staring at trophies in milk crates
On the floor of a northeastern garage
Wondering how it's all such a blessing
And why it's all so damn hard

It's the Massachusetts Turnpike
And when I get home, I'll creep down the hall
Snow in the headlights, they call it a dream
But the world's flat and I'm falling off

Hold your arms out, jump, hell, at least you tried
I fall short, I always fall behind
I hate letting people down
I hate letting people down
I hate letting people down and I do it all the time

I never wanted to hurt you
But I'm elbows deep in that dirt
I still count every unplanted seed
I write down every unspoken word

Hold your arms out, God help the justified
I fall short, I always fall behind
I hate letting people down
I hate letting people down
I hate letting people down and I do it all the time

You get up for work every day
You drag yourself right out of bed
The arms of those angels
Are wrapped around the dreams you left
I look the other way pretending not to notice
I don't know how it died
But I know where the ghost is

I hate letting people down
I hate letting people down
I hate letting people down but I do it all the time
I'm sorry, I hate letting people down
I'm sorry, I hate letting people down and I do it all the time

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The Tunnel

Near the old folk's home past Page Street and Ash
That patch of woods next to the pink laundromat
The things you learn in middle school, you don't learn in class
Stole some weed from your uncle, so we hopped the fence
By the Section 8 housing, back when we were best friends
You saw a brick wall, I found a path

The smell of summer water with nowhere to go
Hanging like vampires under the road

You said, "You can't get out the same way you came in"
Fifteen, you're a kid, sixteen, it changes
Those walls could've caved in any second for all that I knew
So I held my breath, said a prayer and kept running
Till the shape of the end took the afternoon sun in
I don't know how it works or how God picks who gets to get through
It just seems like a lot of life's been mostly the tunnel for you

Your dad sat on an upside-down bucket in the garage watching westerns
With the sound turned down, a cold beer in his left hand
Your mother called him in for dinner, then ate alone
No one asks where you're going or asks how you've been
And you're covered in tattoos, just under the skin
But you're wearing those long sleeves, so nobody knows

I bet the road heading south is somebody's north
Just like somebody's darkness is somebody's torch

Yeah, you can't get out the same way you came in
Still think like a kid when everything changes
Those walls could've caved in any second and blacked out the blue
And I wanted to save you but I just did nothing
Prayed the shape of the end takes the afternoon sun in
I don't know how it works or how God picks who gets to get through
It just seems like a lot of life's been mostly the tunnel for you

There's a light at the end, a light at the end, keep on running
There's a light at the end, I promise, my friend, it's coming
There's a light at the end, a light at the end