I'm lying awake
This insomnia
Can't find my center
Find my chakras
Take a hit out on myself
Like the mafia
Need to change the conversation
Pick new topics, uh
I lead the ring of my own demise
There's not a single day
I don't feel dead inside
And if I told you that I didn't
Then I told a lie
The panic might die down
But there's repeat rise
Clouds in my head carry thunderstorms
And if I bring it up
They're walking out the door
They said they can't handle
Hearing anymore
My demons loud
But you can't hear them roar
So I'm sat alone
With hell between my ears
I over analyze
My most alarming fears
Time starts to slow
Has it been days or years?
Wish I could drive away
But I can't shift the gears
Stuck hurt
Inhale dirt
Wasted my youth
I'm consumed
Flashbacks
Can't go back
Can't undo
I'm consumed
Your grand lies
Behind aqua eyes
You have screws loose
Was consumed
Stole my soul
That was your goal
I still rue
Still consumed
I'm curled in pain, the aftermath
I held the devil
And still feel his wrath
If he knew I still hurt
I know that he'd laugh
Saying"no one can live
If they cross my path"
I still hate myself
For all the wasted time
Getting wasted now
And try to chase the rhyme
But can't find the words
To cover all the crime
So I just meet the fall
Each time I try to climb
Ripping through my waters
You're a hurricane
You're the lightning
And you hit me in the pouring rain
And you'd never take your share
No, not an ounce of blame
You said that I agreed
When I would play your game
And I can't lie, to a degree I did
But it was never played fair
Couldn't crack the grid
I'm cursing every inch
Of how far back I slid
While I lock my pain down
So I can keep it hid
Low self worth
I've unearthed
Wasted my youth
I'm consumed
I catch flack
Stuck in flashbacks
Can't undo
I'm consumed
Hear my cries
That's your prize
You have screws loose
Was consumed
What you stole
Took such tolls
I still rue
Still consumed
Still trapped in every single
Web you spun
Whether it's day or night
I never see the sun
Like a broken record
Replaying all you've done
The only way to end it
Is a loaded gun
I can't move on
Now I can barely move
It's all down from here
Cuz I tried to improve
I failed cuz looking back's
All I can do
Chipped my teeth
Bit more than I can chew
Consumed my thoughts
You still consume my life
I self sabotage
I can't put down the knife
Cutting all the ties
And tell myself it's fine
Because they're better gone
Than just to hear me cry
It's an obsession that I try
But cannot kick
Can't dull it with poisons
No matter which I pick
I can't get to the root
Solve the arithmetics
The only thing I know
Is I'm still in the thick
Wasted my youth
I'm consumed
Can't undo
I'm consumed
You have screws loose
Was consumed
I still rue
Still consumed