Rupert had always wanted
To be a rockstar on the stage
He thought he could be with the 'Right Direction'
But he sang like strangled cats in a rage
He stood before a longish mirror
Rupert practiced some moves he made
He knew he could be a massive someone
'Can you do it Rupert? Yes I can'
I'm gonna be holographic after life
He played some songs that he had written
To a nosey tooting suited company
They said 'Rupert you're a loser get out of my office
You can't do it Rupert no you can't'
'Loser silly Rupert you're a loser
Yes you're a loser you can't sing a note
No sir-ee'
Rupert went on the UK's so talented
The laughter grew to an unheard of size
The public voted he was the winner
And on that day a little piece of him died