Self Medicated (feat. Anika Capetillo) Video (MV)

Difficult to understand why I really overdosed
Currently, don't have all the reasons but i'm coming close
Felt so much uncertainty, couldn't get away from it
Demons here eternally, everyday I hated it
I told the doctors that it wasn't out of suicide
Wanted to escape the pain that made me scarred and traumatized
All of the rejection from wanting your attention
I just wanted someone in my life I could connect with
All my imperfections gave me a perception
I had to be perfect every day and every second
I became obsessed with results and achievements
When they weren't possessed I would have some disagreements
I was always worried how the people would perceive me
Look into the mirror just to see if I was breathing
Plenty blemishes and imperfections in my life
They would keep me up at night, it's when I said alright
Mentally I was going insane
Everyday life was a hurricane
Comfort came when I self medicated
Substances would take away the pain
Another reason why is i'm addicted to attention
Craving validation cause I had so many questions
People couldn't answer anxiety's a cancer
Eats away coherence turns your mind to a disaster
Really put a purpose on impressing individuals
Didn't even care that all my methods were so cynical
Wanted the respect of friends in person on the internet
I would try to gain it quick by giving into their demands
Caught up in the bad lands didn't have a comrade
Me myself and I beside my demons it was unplanned
Didn't care what anybody thought at the time
I just needed reconfiguration of my mind
And I needed to evade and run away from everything
I really thought the drugs would give me all the better things
A sense of euphoria, permanent elation
It was temporary I continued medicating went to
Mentally I was going insane
Everyday life was a hurricane
Comfort came when I self medicated
Substances would take away the pain
Now I have the coping mechanisms use em everyday
Talking to my doctors and they're listening to what I say
I don't trust myself with isolation and depression
So I talk to someone and that person is a blessing
Now I have the coping mechanisms use em every night
Taking my Effexors and they really make me feel alright
I don't feel the pressure and the mental pain I used to
Really overcame it all I tightened up the loose screw
Mentally I was going insane
Everyday life was a hurricane
Comfort came when I self medicated
Substances would take away the pain