I wake up everyday, feeling so damn stressed
Seems like 24/7 I'm upset and depressed
I can sleep for twelve hours but still don't get any rest
And I know this life that I'm living is not my best
I take a look around, at everything I got
And it hurts so much to know that my life isn't pleasing God
I used to have friends but it feels like they forgot
Now I just wanna be happy but I know that I'm not
I pick the bottle up, put the bottle down
Then my whole world just starts spinning around
I lay there drunk and nauseous, passed out on the ground
But why do I do this? I know I'm gonna drown
I'm such a f*cking mess, I don't want no one around
So many things that I'm just trynna figure out
Picking up pieces of my heart off the ground
Love and happiness is what I never found
I don't know what I'm living for
I don't know how much I can take
I hope that I can give it more
I feel like I'm gonna break
I don't know what I'm living for
I don't know how much I can take
I hope that I can give it more
I feel like I'm gonna break
Lonely nights I sit alone and write these songs
I feel so out of place, where do I belong?
I know that this music can't right my wrongs
This is not the plan for my life that I would've drawn
I try to put on a front, I try to fake an appearance
I try to change everyday but I can't see a difference
All these demons in my head screaming "Jackson can you hear us?"
I'm trying to be positive but feel the end is near and
I'm always feeling empty, leaving it all is so tempting
I'm just a kid, only twenty, don't care if you resent me
Because I f*cking hate myself, man I don't want fame and wealth
Sometimes I start to think that the best option is death
I hope I start feeling better, I hope that I can forget her
But know matter what, I know that I'll never forgive her
Maybe one day I'll be glad, maybe I one day I'll understand
Maybe one day I'll laugh and know that this was all Gods plan