The Inbred Bastards - Half Nelson Lyrics

All alone in this smokey bar
Wasting time all by myself
The bartender don't seem too pleased
To hear all of my stories
As I'm getting pissed tonight
Crazy they even let me inside

In front of me there's a woman
That I don't know
She leans over to whisper
Take me home tonight

Half Nelson wohoho
Half Nelson wohoho
Half Nelson wohoho
Half Nelson wohoho

With my body full of booze
It's impossible to loose
Now I'm taking her back to my place
She starts to wrap my package
Just to feel my boner vanish
This shit shouldn't happen at my age

Can you simply stroke it some more
This never happened before
Making up excuses
To why my dick is limp and useless

Half Nelson wohoho
Half Nelson wohoho
Half Nelson wohoho
Half Nelson wohoho

Was about to slip inside
But then my penis died
No I'm lying here ashamed by your side
Might have had a few to drink
And then I start to think
Maybe I'm more into guys
This simply can't be right
My soldiers can't win this fight
Guess I'm not getting laid tonight