So sick of what if how it could have been
Conversational self deprecation
Slipping into my self conscious narrative I recite
As honesty
My truth
Singing solutions from an email to myself
How I'm so tired but could never get enough sleep
For time to heal old wounds that I've held open all this time
Well maybe all that I need is to let myself breathe deeply for once
I won't apologize for wanting change this time
I need to wake up and start learning from the history I replay in my mind
Every night