Endr Won - Love Me Lyrics

Verse 1: You're a good person Kenneth... You know who's said that? Ex-girlfriends, therapists, friends and family have told me for years, "Endr we believe in you..."" and what's crazy when they said it? I actually believe every one of 'em really meant that... but just between me 'n you... the only words I heard were "we"... and "leaving you" yeah I know that I'm f*cked up... what? 'Cause I'm sober, you expected clean laundry? These voices never shut the f*ck up... they remind me who I've been and overcome who I wanna be 'n I'm supposed to suck it up tho... right? I know it's sick but the chaos kinda calms me... I wish I could say I do good things to do good things but I do good... so the bad shit I've done doesn't haunt me! And it's not workin' really... yeah it doesn't take a f*ckin' rocket scientist to tell. I even tried to go to church to heal me... but it's hard to fear Satan when you've already been to Hell. It's really just the mind state I'm used at this point... my emotions change every day like flipped coin like one minute I don't know how anyone could wanna commit suicide. Then I'm googling... how to do it tonight while I'm...

Chorus: Tossin' in bed with these thoughts in my head like... ""Is this who I am?"" When the man in the mirror is a man that I fear and... I can barely stand. I'm just tryin' to love me... yeah, I'm tryin' to love me the best I can! Yeah I'm tryin' to love me! My wrist is slit, please take my hand, please take my hand!

Verse 2: I need help and I know it... but I f*ckin' hate to show it so I pray you can't notice... and don't mistake what my approach is... Inside me's a magician always playin' hocus-pocus like... if we met today and I can keep your opinions of me strictly based on heroics... or maybe with these mean lookin' tattoos and my face all stoic... I can take away your focus. Illusion 101... see the art of distraction... I gotta be quick with this trick so I don't screw it up, couple that with the self applied pressure I feel trapped in... between I'm never good enough... and I never do enough so maybe if I just... put out more content... tell my son Hold on while I reply to all your comments. They say enjoy the process! Don't get caught up in nonsense! I'm just hoping you'll believe... I'm someone that I'm not yet!

Chorus: Tossin' in bed with these thoughts in my head like... ""Is this who I am?"" When the man in the mirror is a man that I fear and... I can barely stand. I'm just tryin' to love me... yeah, I'm tryin' to love me the best I can! Yeah I'm tryin' to love me! My wrist is slit, please take my hand...

I've spent a lotta time in my counselors chair... 'cause really? It's myself scare 'cause with these same hands I fold to say prayers? I've left people in pools of blood like I don't even care see if you knew shit like that would still listen? I wouldn't blame you for a second if you looked at me different... I'm a juxtaposition with every hook that I've written... Like I got so much to lose but I'm still lookin' to risk it. My past crooked n wicked... barely look for forgivenesses__ plus ashamed to admit that it felt good 'n I miss it... Even when I get on track it's like my train derails. I'm even paranoid when I rap... I might frame myself... 'cause if I say too much then I'll incriminate myself and I don't need a jury's help for me to try to hang myself! Ever since the age a twelve! Tryin' to hide the pain the I felt! Mom says that I ain't myself but too stubborn to take the help so now I'm just...

Chorus: Tossin' in bed with these thoughts in my head like... ""Is this who I am?"" When the man in the mirror is a man that I fear and... I can barely stand. I'm just tryin' to love me... yeah, I'm tryin' to love me the best I can! Yeah I'm tryin' to love me! 'Cause who I was isn't who I am, this is who I am!

This is who I am...