Journal Entry 1 Video (MV)

And it's the same ole thing
The Same Ole thing
The same ole thing
Yeah

They told me title it
Write it down
Til I'm tired of it
Crossing out all the inside fighting
You'll see the Why's of it (y)
We'll start with heart
Since the beats are always just breaking the mind
And that's a part of it
Never should i have talked of it
Or so I think
But With these shackles I've placed
My heart was limited
From trying to take
So giving all of me
Was honestly
The only path I'd knowledge to take
It's all I knew
And then it falls into place
The death
Deception
Lies
Protection of a heart I'd never known I could break
And losing everything
Was all it would take
For me to understand
The hurt
And that's what molded me
The thoughts of mistakes
But giving all of me was worth it
I think?
Or so I thought
From yall I'm different
It shows
Not to be bragging
Or cold
In fact it's sadder
When told
Cuz everything that's leading here
Is just to lead to the goal
Take what you get
And then go
I'm thanos
Arthur meming
Rocking the infinity stones
And if I snap I'm losing everything
At least a part of it
Though
It's repetition
It's triggering at the thought of it
But
My love for y'all
Is encompassing even all of it
Trying to fight a war
With an army where you're the heart of it
And
Then I met you
It all went away
I felt
Normal
Partly the same
My heart was feeling shit
My mind can't explain
Could really hardly contain
I could never believe it
Doing things I thought were insane
My heart is complicated
At least I see it as such
Believe the basics
Is amazing
Been mistreated enough
I'd rather
Be hard to read
Then starting believing in trust
And be crippled by all this weight
Then see this love as a crutch
Don't prop me up upon it
See they promised they'd never lie to me
Told me to never change
And then cast me out of society
Either for what I am
Or the version in which I'm tryna be
Sip of the river styx
While they closet judge my sobriety
So
I know your feelings with me
You wanted real
And I promised there ain't one realer than me
You wanted time
And I gave it to you as quick as can be
The things you want
And what you need I got
So really why's it different with me
Come on