Can't seem to be happy for a week
I am scared of everything
That I try to leave behind
But I can't escape my mind
Every time my room goes black
I keep digging up my past
'Till I've buried myself in it once again
Can't seem to be anything I want
I'm just a name with different fonts
Just a boy tied up in knots
And a number that's been blocked
About ten too many times
Fill my pockets full with dimes
And I'll spend it all on music and fruit-gum
And no one wants to see when I'm numb
There's gotta be something I can do
Or am I just not meant to be loved?
I'd rather feel nothing than the blue
Most days I just feel like I'm stuck
My friends can tell me I'll get through
But they can never say enough
And I guess that's how it goes
But maybe I'm too good at giving up
(Ooh)
Walking home with salt beneath my eyes
And a mouth-full of white lies
In the hoodie where I hide
From every car that passes by
From the green out to the grey
I shouldn't be out this late
If my mom found out, I know that's what she'd say
Trouble as I watch the walls cave in
Living on melatonin
In the room that I'm alone in
I never thought I'd grow used to the feeling of regret
And dancing with silhouettes
Of the people that I cared about
But I didn't share my whereabouts
So they left me in the blink of an eye
And two or three never said goodbye
And they all think that I'm doing fine
But here i am today
Standing with friends that want me to be alright
But I can't even f*cking do that right
And sometimes it doesn't feel like I'm alive
I wanna close my eyes and say goodbye
I wanna close my eyes for the very last time
There's gotta be something I can do
Or am I just not meant to be loved?
I'd rather feel nothing than the blue
Most days I just feel like I'm stuck
My friends can tell me I'll get through
But they can never say enough
And I guess that's how it goes
But maybe I'm too good at giving up
(Blisters on my hands
And I am sinking through the sand
That I once swam above, swam above
Twist me into what you can
The pills don't work, so I just ran and ran
I just ran and ran)