Cal Scruby - My Anxiety Lyrics

I find it hard to describe my anxiety
Feel like my heart and my mind got a rivalry
Feel like my thoughts and emotions are fighting inside of me
I gotta get this shit out of me
I feel like forrest, I'm running from everything
I never saw that shit in it's entirety
If you need someone to get something 90% done and quit on it
You should just hire me
I'm feeling closer to death
I feel a hole in my chest
Feel like I'm stuck underwater
Feel like I'm holding my breath
Like it's the only one left
Nobody know I'm depressed
Even the people that know me the best
I called my momma, she told me to rest
I only get out of bed to get more cigarettes
Yeah

I've been so close I can taste it
I've been so far, I've been patient
I take a bar and get wasted
Part of my brain is erased when
I go to Mars in a spaceship
It's written all on my face and no one relates
I don't know how long I can take it
You want a smile, I'ma fake it, copy and paste it
That's an alright imitation
Yeah

Is someone coming to save me?
I'm faded, it don't even phase me
I've had a hater that's showing me love
And I've had a lover betray me
I've had a lot of lessons, still got a lot of questions, still don't got any answers
Eat your veggies, pray for a lotta blessings, die from like twenty cancers
That's why I'm taking these drugs
That's why I'm up til the morning
Shot after shot after shot, I can't stop it, I'm zoning
Shrugging like Jordan did playing against Portland
Still can't afford all the shit that I need
I get too anxious when I hit the weed
I take a pill and I'm feeling relieved
I take another, I triple the speed

I've been so close I can taste it
I've been so far, I've been patient
I take a bar and get wasted
Part of my brain is erased when
I go to Mars in a spaceship
It's written all on my face and no one relates
I don't know how long I can take it
You want a smile, I'ma fake it, copy and paste it
That's an alright imitation
Yeah

I'm looking happy online but it's not what you think
I'm losing touch if I'm touching a screen
One minute, I think I love everybody
And then I'm like f*ck everything
I'm looking happy online but it's not what you think
I'm losing touch if I'm touching a screen
One minute, I think I love everybody
And then I'm like f*ck everything
On a highway to hell, or a stairway to heaven
And I'm stuck in the middle, I can't make a decision
I don't think I'm suicidal, but if I was I won't admit it
Like I'd be okay with dying, if I'm not the one that did it

I've been so close I can taste it
I've been so far, I've been patient
I take a bar and get wasted
Part of my brain is erased when
I go to Mars in a spaceship
It's written all on my face and no one relates
I don't know how long I can take it
You want a smile, I'ma fake it, copy and paste it
That's an alright imitation
Yeah