Chris Webby - House Party Cypher Lyrics

Flying in the car, looking like a star, just like a galaxy
Go so hard like a callus be, uh
Burning more things than calories

I see you homie, I see you. Working, huh?

You feel me? You see me right? I got bars, kid

Word? That's what's up man

Hold up, you heard of Chris Webby though?

Chris Webby? Man I ain't worried about Chris Webby, man, I told you. I'm the illest out here in CT, I'm not worried bout no motherf*cking ninja turtles, f*ck a Mario man, this motherf*cker looks like f*cking Rob Dyrdek and shit, f*ck that dude

Funny story, he's here right now!

Oh word, like here? At this part?

Ayo Web!

Nah nah nah it's cool...

Web!

Yo chill, chill, chill, chill...

Come check this dude out, this dude is crazy

Yo man, Bar Stallone that's my name. Introduce me as Bar Stallone, Please

F*ck outta here. Ayo Web! Yo get your hands off that bitch

What!?

Yo he's busy man just leave him alone, cmon man

F*cking fine, alright listen baby, you just stay right there for like 5 minutes, I swear to God I'll be right back. (to kid) What do you want? What the f*ck is up?

This dude is talking mad shit, show him what the f*ck time it is

Alright. Yo Kenny! Kenny!

Who the f*ck is Kenny...

Get over here real quick, man, we need a beat box, man

Right now?

C'mere man, just come over here man

Alright, alright I'm coming

Ayo everybody keep it down for a second

No no no keep partying, y'all keep going

Gotta do a little rap thing, ya know? You ready?

I'm ready

What the f*ck is that?

Yo, it's Chris Webby
At this party and shit, motherf*cker wants me to rap
I'm about to open an abortion clinic right next to your local church
And go to narcotics anonymous hustling coke and percs
I'm just trying to piss you off, I really hope it works
Go berzerk, I got a dirty mouth, I'll never hold a curse
Jerking off until my motherf*cking shoulder hurts
Even if she vegan she gon swallow when my boner squirts
Help an older lady across the road, "hey can I hold your purse?"
Then kick her in front of a moving bus, "oh no, she's hurt!"
Shit I'm pretty sure she's dead but you can check yourself
While I run her wallet and spend all the money at Taco Bell
Anyone this deranged should surely be locked in jail
I'm on the grind but off the rails like an Eric Koston fail
I hit it rapid fire, try to pull out of a vaginal cavity
But busted while I was half inside her
Then I woke up in the morning and had a reminder
That she getting plan B for breakfast with an apple cider
Someone pass the lighter, I need some weed to breathe in
He's a demon, dirty mind, sneaky heathen
I don't need a reason
I'm creeping up like sex offenders with binoculars on a beach in bikini season
You won't see me leaving, I'm running through that
Stomp you to death then throw my Nike's back on the shoe rack
Huh I'ma do that, why bother tryna bleach the blood stains out?
Somebody told me orange is the new black
So I scrub my white T til it turns the color copper
And use some Tide detergent and throw it up in the washer
It's weird that I ain't crazy though, shit you can ask my doctor
Sike, I'm off my rocker like an active grandfather, motherf*cker

Your turn, bro

I actually gotta save my voice for my open mic tomorrow, bro

Oh yeah? That's cool bro. Seriously. (to party) Who wants to get back to drinking?!