Holistically Lobotomied Video (MV)

Hop on the deck
I'm on a quest
To better things
Before I break ya neck we can count up all my rings
From broken promises
That left me in a frozen land
And thinking opposite that I would be the chosen man
I'm sorry I can't be the one you needing
My heart is on the floor can't you see its barely beating
It's not the same I hate to say that I'm the one leaving
Forgot the way to run this race and now I'm barely breathing
Hold up
I think I need a sub so I can catch my breath
A second of remembrance is what you get with death
Looking for a better way to get things off my chest
Talking to myself my thoughts begin to manifest
Slowly struggling I'm drunk again tryna numb again
My thumbs are fumbling to understand why people coupling
Smudges rubbing in from double gin
It's another sin
The margin in between a win a truth that I find trouble in

Aww man why I feel this way
Never in the moment looking forward to another day
Where I'm lost in the forest it's my own hiding place
Anxiety Escapes control it's shifting to an upper case
I feel the hate inside so I should let it brew
Spitting up the grief I ate it was too hard to chew
Isolated in my space jamming to a tune
Reminiscing missing hips but now I think we're through
I'm feeling lonely
I'm feeling lonely in my f*cking room
Never feeling good enough I write it to the display the proof
Running from the future cuz I know that I will hate the truth
Spilling all my thoughts out need a vacuum up here in the booth
Swiffer duster up all my mental images
Wipe the soot clear to view success becoming imminent
Turnt my channel on just to mute and now you missing it
Talked to you the other day and thought that you would give a shit
Saw you in a colored room loving on another
Your private life is yours to hide So wont you close the shutters
I'll decide if I reside by myself with clutter
The Apple of my eye has rot I cannot look for lovers
I ripped my heart out then I threw it on the table
Started reminiscing over beats sharing fables
The irony in that is I don't know if I am able
To synthesize a verse of rhymes and get a show on cable
A wiz behind the curtain but you need a sneak peek
The tin man ticker thinks he needs a realer f*cking beat
Searching for my dose of cream like a baby rza
Can I make it in this place or do I need some scissors
To cut and paste some finer days more than meatless fillers
Bigfootp is cookin tea but does he want to spilla
Got a broken heart but I mean it in a real way
Anomalies have got to me I don't know what to say
I'm feeling broke and out of jokes so this is how I hang
Up in the tree no one to see I think it's best for me
Im coughing up cacophonies the beat will say "he bodied me" Holistically lobotomied