Got new pictures on my phone
I don't remember them at all
Awake, but barely breathing
I knew i shoulda stayed at home
Never good at self control
I've always been extreme yeah
My friends are worried
That's the truth, my mom
Would be so worried too
I think i'll save it all for therapy
Cuz i pay too much to still be sad
It honestly makes me real mad
I'll tell myself i'm f*cking happy
Cuz i have to be.
I get scared
Just a little and it's
So unfair
Don't know how to say it
Oh my god i'm hurting
This can't be the best version of me
Way too long
I've been medicated
Might have to change
What i'm taking
Guess that i'm this person
This can't be the best version of me
Close my mouth, don't make a sound
I'll just keep things to myself
I'm wide awake & dreaming
Of a place where i could run away
Maybe be born on a different day
In a different body
This shits exhausting
The skeletons taking up
Too much space in my closet
My friends are worried
That's the truth, my mom
Would be so worried too
I think i'll save it all for therapy
Cuz i pay too much to still be sad
It honestly makes me real mad
I'll tell myself i'm f*cking happy
Do i have to be?
I get scared
Just a little and it's
So unfair
Don't know how to say it
Oh my god i'm hurting
This can't be the best version of me
Way too long
I've been medicated
Might have to change
What i'm taking
Guess that i'm this person
This can't be the best version of me
I'm so sick of dealing
With this perpetual feeling
I don't wanna fight anymore
Might be dead inside
I cant help it but i'm trying
I just can't pretend anymore