Arrange - caller Lyrics

Clear of mind for a decent amount of time
I've been seeking out a while I cant just forget everything for a minute
Will you help me understand?
Why I can't even bear to stand
I had a damn good run, 12 months.
Then you came back and I couldn't help myself

It'll be easier to fall this time than it has been before
I have a better excuse to justify my reasons
Just put it all on everything else
And run it all again
And run it all again
And run it all again
And run it all again

I wish I could do away with you
I have these overwhelming thoughts of you breaking in and murdering me at night
I hardly sleep anymore
I'm aware, but unable to accept or do anything to take accountability
I sound like a f*cking book
Leather bound and lying on a doctors bookshelf
It's the most obvious thing I'd say
Just put it all on everything else
And run it all again
And run it all again
And run it all again
And run it all again

I'll play some more guitar
Strum the only four chords I know
And get distracted when I think about
The ride in to work

This morning and how my mother called a lawyer in Georgia
Explaining that the 40 year sentence you had
Was about as long as it was going to get
And that this retrial could push things down to a 10 year minimum
I watched my mother choke on air and try to tell him she understands
And that she wants to be there for everything
She blames herself, as I blame myself
mother's guilt she'll always have
I can see she hates a part of herself for it
But I sit in the passenger seat and listen
I don't know how to show that emotion anymore

And run it all again
And run it all again
And run it all again
And run it all again

Clear of mind for a decent amount of time
I've been seeking out a while I cant just forget everything for a minute
Will you help me understand?
Why I can't even bear to stand
I had a damn good run, 12 months.
Then you came back and I couldn't help myself