Alucrud - What Just Came out of My Belly Button? Lyrics

TV's buzzin', I've seen it all before
Bag of chips, crumbs on the floor
No calls, no texts, nowhere I gotta be
Just watching some 90s TV

Loungin' on the couch, got nothin' to do
Flippin' through channels, tryin' to get through
My hand's on my gut, feelin' lazy and slow
I poke my belly button, like, "What's down below?"

Diggin' 'round my belly, expectin' lint
Fuzz or crumbs from last night's stint
It starts to feel thick and weird
Then out comes something with a beard

What just came outta my belly button?
Something slimy, stinkin', straight-up rotten
It's got eyes and teeth, crawlin' on the floor
Hissin' at my wife, she heads for the door

This thing's got legs, man, it's movin' fast
Leaving trails of whatever it passed
My dog took one look, bolted outta sight
I'm sittin' here, like, "That can't be right."

What just came outta my belly button?
Something nasty and fierce, it's got me shuttin'
All the windows, all the doors, slitherin' around
It's hissing at the cat, makin' a gross sound

It's got a stench so foul
Smells like a dumpster and wet dog towel
Do I freak out? Nah, I just sigh, (hehe)
I grab a beer, ain't gonna lie

What just came outta my belly button?
Something horrid and crude, but it ain't got nothin'
On the mess I left after too many shots
So I'm chillin' on the couch, connectin' dots

It slithered out the window, gone in the night
I'm back watchin' TV, ain't that just life?
What came outta my belly button? Something rare?
I've seen worse, who the hell cares?