Alucrud - Bagels and Bedlam Lyrics

It was a quiet Tuesday, everything was fine
Coffee brewing, people lost in the grind
Linda filing papers, Jim on the phone
Office life, where boredom calls home

Then the copier jammed, Rachel slammed her fist
Steve smashed his mouse, veins popping in his wrist
Something snapped, something broke in every single mind
And soon enough, the whole damn place turned blind

With RAGE!!

The office went insane, bodies crashed to the floor
Desks flipping, blood dripping, carnage at the core
Staplers cracking bones, screams filled the sky
All out office war, no one asks why

Rachel grabbed a chair, swung it at Steve's face
Jim broke Beth's nose, blood all over the place
Frank throws his monitor, Beth has a blade
Consumed by violence, a chaotic charade

Teeth hit the floor like shattered glass
Chairs are swung, skulls are smashed
Linda claws and Rachel bites
Co-workers fight with all their might

The office went to hell, bodies tanglin'
Phone cords stranglin', bones 'a manglin'
Steve broke his knee, Rachel's swinging steel
Faces are strained and the pain is real

But then
The door opens wide and everyone stops
It's so quiet, you could hear a pin drop
Dave from HR stands in the entrance
"Bagels are here," he says, "now's your chance"

Everything, sesame, cinnamon too
And just like that, the madness withdrew
All was calm, the spell was broken
Bloody hands reached out, not a word was spoken

The almighty bagel, the office savior
Now the office has a little flavor
Thanks to bagels, the blood's wiped clean
Another day working for the machine

ALL HAIL THE BAYGULL! THE CORPORATE SAVIOR

BAY
GULL
BAY
GULL