Samwell Tarly's got his head in his books
He's reading his life away
Samwell Tarly's overfed by his cooks
And after they clear his tray
I bet the servants say
"Poor Sam, bookish and fat"
They say, "Poor Sam, who'd want a man like that?"
But there's more, Sam
A highborn son can have more
It depends what he's hungry for
Everyone wants a place at the table
Everyone wants a seat
Nobody knows how much they are able to chew
Hitherto the time to eat
So who eats their fill?
Who drains their cup?
The heir to Horn Hill
Can throw his hands up
Or take the first bite
The question is, does he have the appetite?
Father eats the moment dinner is served
Drinks have barely begun to fizz
Father captures, from all I've observed
What overindulgence is
"Cut the meat for His Lordship!"
"One more dish for His Lordship!"
Just like a pufferfish brought aboard ship
All he can do is swell
Is that the face of House Tyrell?
I tell you
Everyone wants the world on a platter
Everyone wants the cake
Father's a pig, he keeps getting fatter
Why not? Take the pot if it's yours to take
But wait if you can
Learn how to save
A gluttonous man forgets how to crave
And that isn't right
If life's a feast, you'd best work up the appetite
And I've got the appetite
I've tasted Dornish plums
Felt them burst in my mouth
I've tasted Arbor grapes
Apricots from across the South
Summer peaches, every type
Autumn pears, overripe
Yet none of them quite do the trick
Not when there's a prince to cherry-pick
Seven kingdoms will be Joffrey's to claim
Seven ruled as one
They'll cry, "Hail King Joffrey, the first of his name!"
And once his reign's begun
Joffrey needs a son
Influence grows
Like a climbing rose
And soon I'll be climbing along
Not just growing up
But growing strong!
Growing strong!
For this maiden fair
The climb may be steep
But my future's there
Inside the Red Keep
And when it's in sight
I guarantee
They'll all bend the knee
To Queen Margaery
And her royal appetite!